BUILT DIFFERENT — DATING GOD’S WAY
Beautiful things aren’t built by accident… They are built according to a blueprint.
THE PROBLEM
Somewhere along the way our culture convinced us that we could throw away God’s blueprint and still expect God’s results.
1- Stop Searching, Start Becoming
2- Don’t Date Projects aka Choose Wisely
3- Don’t Play House
POINT 1 - STOP SEARCHING, START BECOMING
Before you start searching, start becoming. Don’t wish your season of singleness away. It's a gift.
“I wish that all of you were (single) as I am. But each of you has your own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that.”
1 Corinthians 7:7–8 (NIV)
“I would like you to be free from concern. An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord’s affairs—how he can please the Lord. But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world—how he can please his wife—and his interests are divided… Women… I am saying this for your own good… that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord.”
1 Corinthians 7:32–35 (NIV)
Big idea: Singleness offers unique freedom for wholehearted devotion to Christ.
Singleness is a gift from God, not merely a season to endure.
Singleness is not a waiting room for marriage… it’s a valid calling…
Singleness is not a second rate form of Christianity… it is a gift from God.
“Flee the evil desires of youth and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart.”
2 Timothy 2:22 (NIV)
Two commands:
1 - Flee.
2 - Pursue.
The Christian life isn’t just about running from sin.
It’s about running toward Jesus.
diōkō (dioko) = “pursue”
Before God prepares someone for you, he’s preparing you for someone.
HOW?
1. Read your Bible.
2. Pray everyday.
People who are "Built Different" build relationships differently.
POINT 2 - DON’T DATE PROJECTS A.K.A. CHOOSE WISELY
Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.
Proverbs 4:23 (NIV)
Whoever gets access eventually gets influence. And whoever gets influence will eventually shape your future. So don’t confuse being loving with leaving the gate wide open.
The MOST important decision outside of choosing Jesus is choosing your spouse.
While the Bible might not say anything about dating, it does have a lot to say about wisdom:
2 Wise Questions to Ask Before Dating:
- Does this person’s life show the fruit of the spirit?
“The fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.”
Galatians 5:22-23 (NIV)
- Does this person draw me closer to Jesus?
“Do not be deceived: Bad company corrupts good character.”
1 Corinthians 15:33
When you’re around them, do you become more like Jesus… or just more like them?Because the right person won’t compete with your relationship with Christ. They’ll encourage it.
Questions before you date someone:
- Does this person genuinely love Jesus?
- Is this person making me more like Jesus?
Use wisdom, guard your heart. Not everyone gets access
How do we honor God while we’re waiting?
POINT 3 - DON’T PLAY HOUSE
Are we taking our cues from culture or from Christ?
“That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.”
Genesis 2:24 (NIV)
Leave.
Cleave.
Become one.
The covenant comes before the intimacy, not the other way around.
Pre decide your boundaries.
- Boundaries don’t limit love, they protect it.
- Don’t act married until you’re married
Real love never asks someone to dishonor God to prove their love
God isn’t trying to make your life harder. He’s the Designer, and designers know how their designs work best.
So don’t play house. Build your relationship according to God’s blueprint. Because God’s design isn’t meant to steal your joy. It’s meant to protect your future.
Make a Decision