Can a Christian Divorce & Remarry?
The questions are:
Can a Christian divorce his/her spouse?
And if divorce occurs, can there be remarriage?
Forbes Advisor: Divorce Stats 2024
Average length of marriage is 8 years.
Under Roman Law and customs there were four types of marriages:
1. Slave Marriage, allowed by the Master in which the two slaves would live in a contubernium, which means, “tent companionship.” The arrangement lasted only as long as the owner permitted.
2. A Usus—a form of common law marriage after two people had lived together for a certain amount of time. Defacto.
3. A coemption in manum: a father would sell his daughter to a perspective husband.
4. A confarreation: two people in love exchanging vows and celebrating with families much like we do today.
In all four types of marriages, divorce was very common.
Now for the matters you wrote about: 'It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.'
-I Corinthians 7:1
Phrase: "To be single."
Paul is saying that it is good to remain single!
The Lord God said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.'
-Genesis 2:18
I wish that all of you were as I am. But each of you has your own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that.
-I Corinthians 7:7
But Paul knew that most were not called to singleness and few could endure it…so he writes…
But since sexual immorality is occurring, each man should have sexual relations with his own wife, and each woman with her own husband.
-1 Corinthians 7:2
The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife.
-1 Corinthians 7:3-4
Some in Corinth were teaching that marriage intimacy was unspiritual and unrighteous.
Paul says intimacy in marriage is not just a pleasure but a duty.
The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife.
-1 Corinthians 7:4
The context is love and appreciation, not abuse or control.
Three Great Concerns for Modern Marriage.
[h2]One: There is very little leaving and cleaving.
That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.
-Genesis 22:24
Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?
-2 Corinthians 6:14
Two: Procreation is confused with Intimacy.
Three: Sexual intimacy is not a priority.
Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. I say this as a concession, not as a command. I wish that all of you were as I am. But each of you has your own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that.
-I Corinthians 7:5-7
Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I do. But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.
-I Corinthinas 7:8-9
Widows = cherais: single people who were once married but lost a spouse to death,
Unmarried= agamos: indicates those who were once married but are not widows and not virgins. Term used to describe those who were married but now divorced.
Context: Paul is speaking to people who were divorced before coming to Christ (many times) and answering the question: Can we marry again?
- It is good to remain unmarried.
- But only if you have not been called to singleness
- And only if you are not dominated by the desire for intimacy.
But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.
-I Corinthians 7:9
What does the Bible say about divorce?
To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.
-1 Corinthians 7:10-11
Context of Corinth: Why divorce?
1. They thought they could be more holy and spiritual if they were single.
2. Their spouses were not believers.
3. They wanted to marry someone else—perhaps a Christ-follower.
Paul says, “No.” “Marriage is sacred.”
What God has joined together let no man separate.
-Matthew 19:6b
God hates divorce. (Malachai 2:16)
To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.
-1 Corinthians 7:10-11
To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband.
-1 Corinthians 7:12-14a
For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband.
-1 Corinthians 7:14a
Context: Some Corinthian Christians were concerned that the unbelieving spouse would defile the home, the marriage and the children.
Paul says the opposite is true: Both the children and the spouse could be sanctified through the believing wife or husband.
“Sanctified” does not refer to salvation!
Sanctified: refers to something being “set apart” for blessing not something being “saved.”
All the blessings and graces that flow into a believer’s life from heaven will spill over to enrich all who are near.
But if the unbeliever leaves, let it be so. The brother or the sister is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?
-I Corinthians 7:15-16
Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? Or what does a believer have in common with an unbeliever? What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols? For we are the temple of the living God. As God has said: 'I will live with them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they will be my people.’
-2 Corinthians 6:14-16
The best thing for a person is to grow in their relationship with Jesus and to discover that everything they are searching for is found in Him.
Leave: chorizo (greek, kho-rid'-zo) = divorce
But if the unbeliever leaves, let it be so. The brother or the sister is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?
-I Corinthians 7:15-16
How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?
-I Corinthians 7:16
The marriage bond is broken by:
1. Death.
For example, by law a married woman is bound to her husband as long as he is alive, but if her husband dies, she is released from the law that binds her to him.
-Romans 7:2
2. Adultery.
I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.
-Matthew 19:9
3. The unbeliever (leaving) the unbeliever.
But if the unbeliever leaves, let it be so. The brother or the sister is not bound in such circumstances…
-I Corinthians 7:15a
Where divorce is permitted, remarriage is permitted.
First: What constitutes “sexual immorality?”
Porneia= sexual activity outside of marriage.
- Homosexuality/prostitution/incest
- Any sexual act outside of marriage
Second: What constitutes “leaving” or “divorcing” or “abandonment”?
Many Christians have tried to keep a marriage together even when the spouse has left a long time ago, or, desperately wants out.
First: Marriage is hard work.
It’s beautiful but it’s not easy.
Second: Marriage does not work.
Most marriage issues are common and can be resolved; but you must resolve them!
Third: Marriage conforms us to the image of Christ.
In marriage you learn what it is to truly love someone like God loves you.
Fourth: Divorce is sometimes necessary!
Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, 'Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?' 'Haven’t you read,' he replied, 'that at the beginning the Creator "made them male and female," and said, "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh"? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, let no one separate.'
-Matthew 19:3-6
Jesus says that if you understand marriage, you will discover that divorce is not like taking off your clothes but more like taking off your arm.
“Put Asunder”= Amputation.
What are the reasons for amputation?
By death.
By adultery.
By the unbeliever (leaving) the unbeliever.
Divorce is not the unforgiveable sin!
- Repent of the sins of the past.
- Commit your ways to God in the future.
- Embrace his mercy and forgiveness.
- Get up, Get Going, Get over it.
Christ followers who have committed adultery:
- Repent of the sins of the past.
- Commit your ways to God in the future.
- Embrace his mercy and forgiveness.
- Get up, Get going, Get over it.
But understand. You have lost the trust of your spouse.
This is the reason Jesus made allowance for divorce, However, divorce is like an amputation.
I gave faithless Israel her certificate of divorce and sent her away because of all her adulteries…
-Jeremiah 3:8a
God says,
“I’ve been through it all! Humiliation and Rejection!
“I’ve experienced the pain and betrayal.”
“I know all about the anguish of broken vows and hard-hearted people.”
I will betroth you to me forever; I will betroth you in righteousness and justice, in love and compassion.
-Hosea 2:19
Make a Decision